Tread softly, lest ye drown in the depths of my insanity........

Well...heard from the company i was applying to for a summer placement..i did'nt get through..tough..o well..that in itself does not bother me..only one person was selected from our group and if that person was better then me then so be it..i know the guy who was selected and he is a fantastic chap..when i was told that only one person had got through, i asked them if it was him and they said it was..he deserved it and i am happy he got through..

But when i heard why they had not selected me the reason they gave me got me thinking..and to be honest, got me more than a bit annoyed..

They liked mostly everything they saw..academically i was one of, if not the best in the group..the presentation was great..the time management and group exercise went well..but they rejected me because i was not able to give them specific examples in the interview..incidents from my past which matched the scenario they presented...but it was not for lack of experience..in fact, quite the contrary..the two questions i was unable to relate to specific incidents were about how i dealt with giving criticism to people and how i behaved when i had to break bad news to friends and comforted them and helped them...at that point of time, it was impossible for me to come up with any one specific incident..criticising people is something i do not do often..yeah, i know that i may be frank, sometimes to the point of rudeness..but thats a bit different from criticism..and even when i do, it is hardly an incident i particularly care to remember...as for dealing with people in vulnerable or emotional states,...again, it is something i do without thinking..if i help someone, it is not so that i can stick it on my cv and tell the interviewers that 4 months ago i helped xyz...it is something i do because i feel i can and should..and like most other situations, once it has passed, i forget about it...the fact that i should record what happened in some corner of my mind coz it mite prove to be useful when i need to vomit out the situation and glorify myself later is not really something that crosses my mind..and i would hope that it never would..

Some people said i should have conjured up some story on the spur..which to be fair, i am quite adept at..lol!!..me and my imaginative skills... :D ;) but why should i have to lie in order to show someone that i am genuine and caring and honest..surely that is the most hypocritical deed possible?? and why should the fact that instead of giving one hyped up event, i answered thruthfully about what i would do in such an event and what i have actually done in such events...i don't remember the events in sufficient detail to describe them when asked...but i know what i did..and i know what i would do..i dont recall events, as for me, they are just part of life and helping someone is not a special event but something i do often and subconciously..and surely that, if anything, should be in my favour??

Sigh...tis a sad time when being there for a friend has to become a hollywood blockbuster with all the ingredients simply to get a job..and when u have to conjure up stories to make yourself a glorified permanent do gooder who is surprised as to why he is not being sainted along with mother teresa...

Was def an experience though..left me slightly disillusioned, slightly angered, slightly wiser and yet, at the same time, slightly more confused...a very bizzare and ecclectic cocktail of emotions..but a learning experience nevertheless..to sum it up in three little words of eternal wisdom,.... " Such is Life".....